Last night I pushed myself beyond the limit but my house is SPOTLESS. My back was aching really badly so Ben insisted that he finish folding the loads + loads of laundry I washed. I made Malakai two dinners since he wouldn't eat the first one and I was determined that he tank up so that he would be okay without breakfast this morning. I took half a dose of tylenol pm because I knew I wouldn't be able to stop thinking and fall asleep. Even still I had a lot of strange dreams and woke frequently.
Ben + I rolled out of bed at 6:30am and quietly got ready while Malakai slept. We ate our breakfast and packed his lunch and the rest of his bag for our trip to the hospital before getting him up. He woke up a bit crabby (as usual) but was in a sweet and playful mood the whole car ride and really most of our wait. We arrived at 7:50am with a check in time of 8am and surgery scheduled for 10am. We got into the exam/pre-op room around 8:15 am where they asked us lots of questions, we saw lots of nurses and got Malakai into some very large hospital attire. We met with the surgeon + anesthesiologist, and then we waited...for 2 1/2 hours. The surgery before Malakai was the same procedure and should have only been an hour but took an extra 45 minutes (those poor parents!) so ours started late.
{these socks probably could have fit me!}
{XXL scrubs, the pants fell down halfway to the OR}
Once we got called back, I carried Malakai to the OR for the general anesthesia (they also did a spinal after he was out). Watching him struggle to get the mask off and then pass out was one of the hardest things I've ever experienced. If I didn't know that he would have been worse off asking for me, I would have sent Ben in, it was difficult to watch. I cried of course and met Ben back in the room. I took a moment to gather myself before we went into the waiting room. His mom came to wait with us. She sweetly brought us some coffee and food to eat from the cafe down the hall. We chatted and read magazines to pass the time, watching the screen for updates. The hour of surgery passed quickly, but the 10 minutes where they transitioned him to the PACU was killer.
Dr. W came out to tell us everything went perfectly and to see if we had any questions. Then we waited a couple more minutes before I got up to ask when I could go in to see him. They were just about to come get me, so I went back to find him having just woken up and pulling on his IV, calling for me. He was easily consoled once in my arms. We wrapped his hand in a towel so he couldn't get to the IV and I rocked him. I have never been happier to hold my son, I was filled with so much joy and relief.
We met daddy in his recovery room. He was alert really quickly and drank juice + water right away. He cried often and wanted to get down out of my lap but obviously couldn't, especially because of the spinal. He was happier when they took the IV out of his hand and gave him a popsicle while we watched cartoons and waited for the nurse to finish all the paperwork. Since he was drinking so well we were able to leave relatively quickly. It was just before 2pm when we got home and fed him his lunch. He ate well and then we all snuggled up on the couch and watched "Nemo". He had been walking a bit and doing fine, just a little slower than usual. Around dinner time he was really slowing down and shuffling his feet. It was time for more pain meds and food. He ate dinner better than he ever has before and we had some quiet time. Now he's snoozing softly in his bed and we're praying hard that he doesn't wake up in pain, but sleeps hard and long.
We are beyond thankful for the literal hundreds of people praying over us, the surgeon, doctors, and nurses. We believe that all our prayers were heard. Surgery was fast and perfect, he came out of the anesthesia with very little struggle and wasn't totally inconsolable as we feared he would be, he was brave, and happy and all of the staff took great care of us. The nurser in pre/post op was really doting over me when she noticed that I'm pregnant. She made sure I always had something to drink and offered me snacks (which I snuck while Kai wasn't looking since he couldn't eat).
{daddy + Kai watching cartoons}
Now I have one of the worst headaches I've ever had and am trying to decompress from all the stress and built up anxiety of the day. I'm trying to let the relief of the surgery being behind us wash over me and trust in God to heal Malakai quickly. I am so thankful for...
632. countless prayers sent up by friends, family, and complete strangers.
633. the support of my husband which kept me brave and strong, I shed 1/2 as many tears as I anticipated.
634. transitioning into recovery mode and having the fear of surgery and the what-ifs behind us.
635. having Ben home for a long weekend, I don't think I'd do very well without him!
636. family and friends who have offered to bring us dinner over the next few days.
637. seeing Malakai's fun personality and sweet disposition shine through, another big relief.
638. facebook, twitter, and texts to send everyone quick updates throughout the day.
639. gifts for Malakai, the new toys and books have been a great distraction.
640. how brave Kai was through the whole thing. Never once did he seem truly frightened.
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